What's on my mind?

What's on my mind? That's a very good question, and thank you for asking.

Just so you know, before I begin: this is going to be very, very random. So if - for any reason - doctor's orders or otherwise - you aren't supposed to read insanely random blog posts (or the very thought of them disgusts you), go away. Bye bye. Wait for the next post. Sorry, but I've got quite a bit on my mind.


It's hot. Really hot. I'm not good with heat. If it gets up to 80, I start itching. All over. And it's painful, too. If it gets up too far past 85, I start to get dizzy.


When do you know when the person you love is the one you want to be with the rest of your life? Is it when you hear them cry, and instead of it turning you off, you rush to them to comfort them? Is it when they accidentally overdose themselves on painkillers, and instead of their slurred speech making you want to leave, you feel a sudden desire to take care of them? Is it when you look into their eyes, and you feel like you could lose yourself in them - and in fact, you do? Is it when you realize that cuddling is just as good as sex, and all you really want is to simply be close to them? I see it this way: "When you know, you know you know, you know?" Love is what we make it. If we don't feel it, it's not there. If we need to see it to feel it, it's not there. But love - love is undefinable. It's an umbrella term, and only the wise seem to realize that.


My future seems so different all of a sudden. Don't ask me why. Unless you want me to answer, of course. Ha. But yes - it does. Suddenly, I don't see myself stuck where I am forever. I can look farther into the future than I've ever been able to before. And yes - the future looks bright indeed.


I've noticed that certain subjects can really get me crazy. I mean - they're "don't speak of them unless you're crazy, because you're in for either a heated debate, or a lecture" subjects. Here are some of them. Black holes, 2012, programming (obviously), Macs VS PCs (the commercials), AI, the future of programming, the advance of technology over the past century, and those are just a few of them. Yes, I'm a geek. If you didn't know it before, you do now. But it's fine. Unsubscribe if you want. Or simply don't at all.


I came across an interesting opinion recently. Someone close to me (family, older than I am) has an erroneous opinion of what the definition of a crush is. Now, while the word "love" is an umbrella term, the word "crush" isn't. It's always pretty much the same - with a few small exceptions.

1. A crush lasts about two weeks. Usually. 
2. A crush is based on physical attraction. Always.
3. You get over the person quite rapidly, and don't have feelings for them afterwards. 

Now - here's the interesting thing. This family member (we'll use "Person X" from now on) of mine is convinced that a crush is "One-sided love that ends when one person realizes the other person doesn't like them back. And the first person inevitably becomes 'crushed', and loses all feelings for said person." What?!?! Um... That's a crush, yes, but it's not love. And it doesn't have to be one-sided. Two-sided crushes work, too. And by the way. That girl I mentioned? Emily (last and middle names not going to be mentioned)? Person X is convinced that it was only a crush, and that it lasted what - five years? Without me seeing her once. Also, Person X believes that people younger than about 21 are incapable of love. Now that... Uh-uh. Doesn't work here. Perhaps Person X has forgotten that they claim to have fallen in love with the one they're married to when they were in high school.


If nothing else has clued you in yet, I'm going to say it right now. I feel I'm in love. With who, I won't say - unless they allow me to print it here. But, there you go. Now - if this makes any of you lovely, eligible young ladies out there angry - I'm really sorry. You can't compare. Took me a while to see it, though, to be honest.


Now - something that's been interesting me. I want a show of hands here. Or comments at the end of this blog post, anyway. Women ONLY, please.
On the whole, do you like A. Clean-shaven men, or B. men with short, well-managed beards, better? Also - which is more attractive: A. A man who shaves with a manual razor, or B. a man who shaves with an electric razor? Interesting poll, I think. Put your responses at the end of this post, feel free to be anonymous.


I've always hated country music. Loathed it. I'm sorry, but it's true. I could never stand the music. Always got on my nerves, really fast. But now... I'm suddenly finding that while I may not like the music, I don't find it that bad, either - and I'm loving the lyrics. My favorite country song at the moment - Little Moments. And to be completely honest with you... I've never actually heard the song in my life. I just love the lyrics. I'd put them here for you to read, but I don't want to mess with copyright issues.

Now you're wondering, "What brought about this abrupt change, A Prog?" Really? Only one thing can. Guess.


Also on my mind - my over-protective mother. She prides herself in being able to "take care of me", by teaching me herself instead of letting me learn it on my own. Now, for some things, that's great - paying bills, taxes, certain bits about love, sex (that's a no-go subject right there, by the way), certain bits about college, buying a house, rent, mortgages, etc. Stuff you have to get right the first time through.

But no - she'd rather teach me everything. And it's smothering me, really. She's too protective. Why did my blog start so recently? She wouldn't let me on the Internet until just December of last year. Sure, I made some mistakes when I started, but everybody does. Do you keep your kid from learning to ride a bike just because they're going to fall off and cut themselves up as they learn? No!

I still can't drive. Birthday #20 recently, and I still can't drive. Now, why won't she teach me? She has time. She has the means. Which leaves: A. She's afraid I'll be killed. B. She wants to try to keep thinking I'm younger than I really am. C. She doesn't want me to leave.
I'm going with C.

A bit of added support for this last claim. She rarely lets me out of the house. I'm kinda stuck here. So... I really am atypical, aren't I? Haven't talked to anybody my age (before getting on the Internet) since I was 14. Nice, huh?


I've officially outgrown Phrogram. If anybody knows of any good free programming software out there I can move up to, I'd be glad to hear about it.


Yeah - that's about all the random stuff for today. Have fun reading it.

Aren't you SO glad I'm back? Haha! (Yeah, I know you're groaning - just admit it.)